I'll be there for... nobody

A key point of discussion in sessions with my counselor is the progress I've made in developing a circle of friends. I thought at some point it was something I needed. Certainly everyone needs people they can depend on anytime they hit a rough spot in their lives. But outside of that, I really don't think I need friends and here's why: People suck. I'm not talking about individuals, but put any group of 4+ persons in one room and otherwise decent, tolerable people become a cumbersome, obnoxious mess.

For instance, take any group outing you've ever been on. How often has one the following occurred:

1. Some person delays the whole group by being late.
2. A couple starts fighting and brings down the rest of the group.
3. It takes so long to get moving some people decide they don't want to go, which makes others not want to go, nearly killing all your plans right there.
4. Somebody (more than likely a friend of a friend) turns out to be a psycho/douchebag and ruins the whole thing.

I just described 70% of the gatherings you've ever been involved in, haven't I? No? OK, maybe it's just me.

In any case, I think finding a group of friends (or *shudder* a clique) is something that'll happen when it happens, I can't force it. Although it will take some effort on my part, I don't think I need to put a lot of energy towards it. And going to a party, movie, or club alone shouldn't be this terrible thing that elicits sympathy from every person I talk to. Most of the time I actually prefer flying solo. Watching a movie at the theater with friends adds NOTHING to the experience, unless you're one of those jackasses that talk during a movie (I could write a novel about my hatred for those people). Most excursions to a club or a party succumbs to the same problems listed above. Eventually I just get tired of waiting on people and would rather say "I'll meet you there." At least then I can have a good buzz going.

Besides why find friends when I have this?

You're excited? Check out these nipples!

I've long been a hardcore Nintendo fan. Their games are the best around and they consistently amaze with their innovations. However, the last few years my faith in the company has been waning somewhat. While the software is as awesome as ever (except for the abysmal Yoshi's Story and disappointing Super Mario Sunshine), some of their business decisions concerning CDs and online gaming have come back to bite them in the ass.

I'm beginning to return to the light lately. I initially balked at the gimmicky features of the Nintendo DS, but now I can't wait to get my hands on the next release for the handheld. So despite the absolutely horrid name, I couldn't wait to see what the company had to show for their new console, the Nintendo Wii. The controller is the best thing to come along in years, finally trumping most of the limitations that have prevented game control from advancing. Unlike the DS' touch screen and microphone, the advantages of the new motion-sensing controller are obvious and many. Precision aiming with guns, various sword swings, and easy, intuitive steering will attract everyone and their grandmother.

I wasn't disappointed with what they had to shown. Super Mario Galaxy was shown on video and will be playable on the show floor of E3. Early impressions of Metroid Prime: Corruption suggest an ambitious FPS with intense combatant in large environments. Square Enix has both Final Fantasy and Dragon Quest games on the way and Sega has an exclusive Sonic game in development. Oh yeah, did I mention that a brand new Zelda game will launch with the system? I'm already ecstatic and the company hasn't said one word about the virtual console or it's online plans for the system. There's so much potential here it's ridiculous.

Meanwhile, Sony's conference dragged on and on with demos of Gran Turismo and Ridge Racer in HD. Ho. hum. Microsoft at least showed off Halo 3, which isn't my cup of tea but a big deal nonetheless. Oh and $500 for a system? Thanks, but no thanks. Most people are targeting the Wii at around $200-250, a deal if there ever was one. MS and Sony made an easy decision that much easier. November can't get here soon enough.

A shift, if you will.

Something's happened to me. I'm not sure exactly how it happened or why (well, I have some clue, but I'm not going into it here). In any case, something about me has changed. I'm happy. The realization came last week. It doesn't feel forced or artificial, like when you might smile and think happy thoughts even though you want to die. Even now, despite the fact my probability final looms like a dark cloud and I'm kind of stressed out about it, my general mood is one of optimism. I'll see everything through to the end, I won't run from one problem, I'll be completely honest, and everything will be all right.

I can't remember the last time I felt like this. Certainly I've had my ups and downs, but these had more or less to do with my current state. Even beyond the final exam, I'm facing a serious sh!tstorm in the next month that could turn my life upside down (no I'm not telling you what it is). Nevertheless my outlook is overwhelmingly positive.

Given my generally cold facial expression most people probably can't tell I'm any different. But do some digging and you'll see a shift. I'm not going to wonder how long this lasts or what's going to bring me back down. I'm enjoying it for what it is.