Tuesday, January 17, 2017

And now for something completely different...

I know it's been awhile, and after that last riveting entry you're anxious for more, but for some reason I can't come up with much to write. It's not that nothing's going on, it's just that I can't seem to find the words to make it interesting. Therefore, I present a hastily composed list of random items about my life.

1. I've become addicted to sudoku puzzles. In fact, last night I did one when I couldn't fall asleep.

2. I'm actually dating someone right now. I know, I'm surprised too. No, you're not getting anymore details.

3. Since I'm taking 12 hours of graduate courses, I'm naturally behind in all my classes.

4. In the next few weeks I have two exams and two papers due.

5. The picture is of Okami, a game so incredibly awesome I wonder why I even bothered registering for classes this fall.

6. I saw a very, very good movie called Big Eden recently. Definitely check it out if you can handle a little gayness in your films check http://instantmovies.us.

7. I tried composing a list of 50 interesting facts about my childhood. I don't think I made past it 20.

8. I haven't been home to visit my family in almost two months despite the fact they only live an hour away.

9. For some reason, I've been tired the last two days and have had to take a nap in the afternoon.

10. The aforementioned naps make me stay awake until 2 in the morning.

11. "Dontcha" by the Pussycat Dolls is my latest guilty pleasure.

12. I've been watching Firefly on DVD. Very good show.

13. I still have no idea what's going on in one of my classes. The professor is pretty much a whackjob.

14. I'm finally below 200 lbs again. I swear I never want to get up there again.

15. I could really go for fried seafood today.

Well that's all I have time for now. Leave me some comments!

Who's the Monkey?

Hey, it's time for another look into the cracked window that is my life.

I saw The Lion King off Broadway last Friday. Despite being almost as far away from the stage as humanly possible, I absolutely loved the show. Impressively ornate costumes hung on the actor's bodies and effectively conveyed which characters they were. I can only imagine the amount of time that the actors put into walking on stilts to similate a giraffe. Those things have to hurt. Equally astounding lighting and visual tricks enhanced each and every scene. Watching Mufasa's image slowly develop in the sky as he spoke to Simba from beyond the grave was especially memorable. And the singing! "They Live in You" and "Shadowlands" immediately found their way on to my iPod after I got home. I'd freaking marry the girl who played Rafiki, who's female in the musical. Her powerful voice just commands your attention whether you'd give it or not. Hearing the soundtrack does not do her justice. You have to experience it live.
read also : Pill me up.

Otherwise, classes continue to tighten their grip on my life while video games try to pull me away. Okami has proven itself surprisingly long and addictive. Every time I think I'm near the end of the journey a new part of the world opens up. And that sprite that rides on top of the wolf is hilarious. Now it's two weeks to Final Fantasy XII and another two until the Nintendo Wii and Zelda: Twilight Princess.

Well, that's it for now. Now I have to get back to page three of this five-page paper. :-(

Thursday, December 22, 2016

Pill me up.

Up until last Monday, I had been on Prozac since December 2005. I resisted the urge to share that bit of information since I'm not sure who exactly is reading this blog. Some people (and I'm definitely not referring to my mother when I write this) seem to think that taking pills to alter your mood is unnatural. These same people (again, I am NOT referring to my mother) will nag you to death about their position on the issue when you'd rather slit your wrists than be forced another second of their half-baked rants. Anyway, one week later I feel inclined to share my experiences during and after having taken the medicine.

Prozac is designed to "even you out". While it definitely did that for me, it also meant that my mood rarely hit any highs or lows. Consequently things that would've had an emotional impact on me before fell a little flat. Dramatic moments in movies weren't very touching. Everything just felt blah. I almost never felt my heart pounding. Meeting new people used to make me really nervous, now I barely cared. This backfired a little. A hopeless procastinator, I frequently relied on fear of failure to push me when a deadline was bearing down. With a heartrate that barely fluctuated, I couldn't tap into that anxious feeling to motivate me. Even so, my life improved. My outlook improved.

About a month ago, I discussed going off the medicine with my counselor. Things were better so I felt it was time to move forward. My last dose was last Sunday. The first week went pretty well. My emotions are back. When I was on Prozac, I could tell people about the saddest elements of my life without batting an eye. I attempted to do the same thing this week and voiced wavered for the first time in months. It's kind of annoying in that I want to be the typical macho, no-feelings American male. On the other hand, being so stoic made me feel like someone else.

Overall, I feel OK. Not particularly negative nor unrealistically optimistic. And that's the idea.